Total recall

My blogwriting has become pretty sporadic and uninspired lately. Time demands certainly are complicit in me not writing, but frankly I'm questioning the purpose of this blog. I don't offer any particularly insightful thoughts on much of anything of use. I'm not terribly political. I choose not to talk about work in a public forum. I can only write so many entries about the kids. I don't really follow sports much anymore. I could care less about celebrities or gossip. I'm lucky to write a few sentences of fiction a week.

Yet, I feel it's important to write something. When I get in a groove, I typically find that I feel creatively charged at work. The act of writing just keeps me mentally limber, I suppose.

A thought occurred to me a few days ago as I was having a fairly serious conversation with Sydney about trying harder at school and overcoming fear. I was sharing a few of my childhood experiences as a context and I got, frankly, a fairly morbid thought. What if should drop dead tomorrow or next week? I would never get a chance to share all the mundane details of my life with my kids. Maybe there'd be a few lessons embedded in those details, but beyond that, they'll undoubtedly reach a day years from now when they might wonder if I ever went through what they were experiencing at that time. And if I've croaked, I'd never get the chance to share.

Or what if I'm just in a coma?

Or brain dead?

Or what if, years from now, I get Alzheimer's? Assuming that we haven't transcended physical form in the next three or four decades and computers aren't obsolete, it might be nice to have some sort of recollection of the more distant memories of my youth.

Motivation's a little macabre, I'll grant you, but devoid of anything else to write, it's what I think I'll focus on for a while. At least until something else strikes me.

I didn't say it would be entertaining. Publicly self indulgent, I'm sure. I'll tag them all with "total recall" so you can easily skip them if/when they become laborious to read.